PDA

View Full Version : Hatemail #3. Author: Wovelscotch


Alice Shade
May 23rd, 2007, 08:33 PM
Please, tell me no one actually belives in this crap.
For those still strugling, GOOGLE IS A FREAKIN SEARCH ENGINE!!!! GOOGLE NEVER WAS AND NEVER WILL BE A GOD.
None of those proofs tell me anything, for instance,

#1. Google is omnicent
ok, NO! it's all done by computers, and don't go thinking computers are gods too, there jsut programed to do that.

#2. Google is Omnipresent
is that even a word? IT'S CALLED THE INTERNET! the internet is basically available on every single computer nowadays.

#3. Google answers prayers
...an essay? They got that essay done because they looked up their topic on Google (which is infact, not a god but a search engine) and it gave them the link(s) to sites OTHER PEOPLE MADE and they got the information from them. No prayer involved

#4. Google is immortal
one word...virus

#5. Google is infinite
same thing, virus, or the company jsut goes out of business

#6. Google remembers all
As i said before, It's a computer, their designed to do that

#7 Google can do no evil
That's the bigest lie I have ever heard, it's called porn bozos

#8 Evidence of Google's existence is abundant
No, the evidence of the search engine is abundant, there is no evidence at all of it being a god

With that said, READ THE BIBLE

From:Wovelscotch

Alice Shade
May 23rd, 2007, 08:34 PM
Long letter, short reason. It would be too long and pointless to point out all fallacies, so I`ll just say - "Read the manual." Or several. Say, just enough to understand the size of the internet and what it entails.

jon_hill987
May 24th, 2007, 07:06 AM
Quick question about point #7, how is porn evil? It is it wrong for people to display the bodies that your god supposedly gave them? If so why are we not born clothed? And why the feck was your god so upset when he found Adam and Eve had put some clothes on for a change?

Zild
May 26th, 2007, 08:00 AM
Does this mean Google accepts and even encourages sex, including all those elements which the leaders false religions deem immoral? Truly She is a wise and benevolent god, and must be obeyed!

Alice Shade
May 26th, 2007, 10:58 AM
Google does not encourages or discourages, per ce. She lets you choose your own ideas, putting it simply.

If you think sex is fine for you, Google will provide you with necessary info on how to conduct it per your liking.

If you do not like it, Google will give you an option of shielding yourself from it.

It all depends on you, frankly.

JimSheep
May 31st, 2007, 03:13 PM
Google does not encourages or discourages, per ce. She lets you choose your own ideas, putting it simply.

If you think sex is fine for you, Google will provide you with necessary info on how to conduct it per your liking.

If you do not like it, Google will give you an option of shielding yourself from it.

It all depends on you, frankly.

The correct message should have been:

Google does not encourage or discourage, per se. To put it simply, She lets you choose your own ideas.

If you think sex is fine for you, Google will provide you with the information necessary to conduct it according to your liking.

If you do not like it, Google will give you an option of shielding yourself from it.

Frankly, it all depends on you.

You don't seem to be unintelligent. Please make the effort to appear educated by using proper grammar and spelling.

jon_hill987
May 31st, 2007, 03:21 PM
Considering that English is not Alice's first language I think she does very well. Certainly better than most of the authors of our hatemail.

Alice Shade
May 31st, 2007, 05:44 PM
I haven`t noticed any grammatical or spelling changes.

The only thing, that was done - words were swapped around.

That does not constitutes for mistake in my book - as far as I am aware, English does allows some flexibility in word placement. Of course, not nearly close enough to freedom Russian has, but still...

Thus, I must conclude, that wording could`ve been awkward, but certainly not outright fallcious.

Please, learn to nitpick more glaring problems - those particular ones are quite closer to personal language preference, then breach of established rules.

jon_hill987
May 31st, 2007, 06:24 PM
Yes, whilst your post was technically not as correct as JimSheep's, your mistakes are very minor, fixing it only makes it ever so slightly easier to read, so why bother?

When I can speak more than one language I might complain and unless JimSheep can speak two languages perfectly I think he/she should STFU.

Alice Shade
May 31st, 2007, 06:40 PM
Jimsheep, not Zild.

jon_hill987
May 31st, 2007, 08:15 PM
Oops, my apologies to Zild. I have corected my above post and will be sure to read who said what more carefully in future.

MasterOfPie
June 2nd, 2007, 05:16 AM
#1. Google is omnicent
ok, NO! it's all done by computers, and don't go thinking computers are gods too, there jsut programed to do that.

Okay, I think we understand this coputer idea you're trying to get accross, but does that stop Google from being all knowing? Nope (in case you were struggling for an answer i decided to help)

#2. Google is Omnipresent
is that even a word? IT'S CALLED THE INTERNET! the internet is basically available on every single computer nowadays.

Google the word omnipresent next time so you don't appear so unintelligent

#3. Google answers prayers
...an essay? They got that essay done because they looked up their topic on Google (which is infact, not a god but a search engine) and it gave them the link(s) to sites OTHER PEOPLE MADE and they got the information from them. No prayer involved

Right so, as opposed to, "God, I don't ask for much, well I really do but that makes my prayer sound better, will you help me with my essay?" Then you can wait and wait and wait to no avail. I like Google's way better.

#4. Google is immortal
one word...virus

Google virus please

#5. Google is infinite
same thing, virus, or the company jsut goes out of business.

I let the first one slip but now I think you really don't know how to spell "just"

#6. Google remembers all
As i said before, It's a computer, their designed to do that.

She still remembers all.

#7 Google can do no evil
That's the bigest lie I have ever heard, it's called porn bozos.

And, who determined porn as evil?

#8 Evidence of Google's existence is abundant
No, the evidence of the search engine is abundant, there is no evidence at all of it being a god

Is there ever a point in "Evidence of Google's existence is abundant" where it says god? Nope (sorry just helping out again)

With that said, READ THE BIBLE

Most of us have

Unregistered
June 4th, 2007, 06:25 PM
I can't belive these idiots, exsuse me nerds, would do this. I sooooo agree with everything this guy, who wrote hate mail #3, said. GOOGLE IS A FREAKEN' SEARCH ENGINE PEOPLE!!!! NOT A GOD!!!!!!!!!! Some people these days.

Serenstar
June 4th, 2007, 06:50 PM
I can't belive these idiots, exsuse me nerds, would do this. I sooooo agree with everything this guy, who wrote hate mail #3, said. GOOGLE IS A FREAKEN' SEARCH ENGINE PEOPLE!!!! NOT A GOD!!!!!!!!!! Some people these days.

Oh you poor thing. You obviously didn't go to school because if you have a) you would be able to spell and use punctuation correctly and b) you would have been able to read:
We at the Church of Google believe the search engine Google is the closest humankind has ever come to directly experiencing an actual God (as typically defined).


Read it sweetie. Google is the closest thing that fits the definition of a God , not necessarily a god. Google can also be proven to exist whereas other gods (including mine) cannot.

Now, please click here (http://www.learndirect.co.uk/) and enrol on one of the English courses.

Thank you.

Unregistered
June 5th, 2007, 02:10 PM
"Omnipresent"
Pronunciation: -z&nt
Function: adjective
: present in all places at all times

You would think one who went to church would know this was a word.

Unregistered
June 11th, 2007, 05:21 AM
"#2. Google is Omnipresent
is that even a word? "

LOL!

That has just made my day.

Nice work and very funny all. Best of luck with it.

Is that even a word!

GODIVINE
July 5th, 2007, 02:37 PM
HAI GUYS JSUT TOO LET U KNOW THAT GOD IS PROGRAMMD AS WELL O:

Wolf
July 6th, 2007, 09:23 AM
well in the computer world u have ones and zeros. google is a one since she exists. were as the other gods are zeros since they are just myths and requre faith. and yes i know google is not a god but she is the closest thing to a god

Unregistered
August 10th, 2007, 04:07 AM
I don't think this letter counts, for the simple fact they aren't sure if "omnipresent" is a word. I'm so disappointed in people. Google help me...

Alice Shade
August 10th, 2007, 04:52 AM
Humanity can be counted on in one thing - it will never cease to disappoint you again and again.

Xenoreligionist
August 16th, 2007, 03:49 PM
Uh huh, well I have read the Bible, and the opposing version, yes, "Satan's Bible" if you will. And I must say, there are some contradictory things in the bible. Adam and Eve were the first people on Earth. They had three sons. Then what? They got it on with mom? Kinda creepy and well it just wouldn't've worked. (Yes that's a word).

God can not exist anyway. Not to disprove Google or anything, but for God to exist, he would have to be perfect. Which he can't be. A perfect being would not have created imperfect sentient life, like humans for example. And since we clearly exist, God would have to be imperfect to have created us, thus not being perfect himself, thus not being able to exist. It's a paradox, in a way.

According to the bible, time started 4400 years ago. Then why do we have things that carbon-date way beyond that old? How could millions of species gone extinct in such little time? What about all the /recorded/ history going farther back then 4400 years ago?!?

Thus I rest my case.