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Athleone
September 2nd, 2008, 12:45 PM
My name is Athleone, and I am an atheist. I have read many articles and papers about the existence of God, and I have found that there is nearly no evidence of God's existence.

Even though I think that Google is NOT a deity, it is still the close, and therefore I have joined the Church of Google, partly because of the proof you have revealed to me, and partly for the lulz.

I have so many questions for you guys, but I have chosen the two most important questions to me to ask:

Firstly, if I use Windows XP, have I greatly sinned? Do I have to change my OS or at least use another OS to go on my journey of Googlism?

Secondly, I have seen the prayers section, but how do you pray these prayers?

Oh wait, that's three questions. Never mind that. I would greatly appreciate it if you guys could answer my questions. And with that, happy searching!

rzm61
September 2nd, 2008, 12:57 PM
First and formost.

Welcome to the CoG!


I have so many questions for you guys, but I have chosen the two most important questions to me to ask:

Firstly, if I use Windows XP, have I greatly sinned? Do I have to change my OS or at least use another OS to go on my journey of Googlism?

You will find a bunch of people here using XP, same with Vista. With the winblows users there are the Mac users. And don't forget about the Linux cats.

Secondly, I have seen the prayers section, but how do you pray these prayers?



Shiiit. Good question. I guess just recite them out loud? Or just say them in your head.....you could even open up a new note in 'notepad' and just type it up. There are a few different ways to go about it. Put your own spin on it. :D

Athleone
September 2nd, 2008, 01:34 PM
Thank you for replying, rzm61. Thank you for replying to how to pray the prayers, but either you haven't explained adequately whether it is okay to use Windows XP, or I'm too stupid. :icon_razz: But thanks anyway!

-Athleone

-------------------

Edit:OOPS! Accidental multi-post. My first day here and I screw up something. Not a good omen.

rzm61
September 2nd, 2008, 01:47 PM
Thank you for replying, rzm61. Thank you for replying to how to pray the prayers, but either you haven't explained adequately whether it is okay to use Windows XP, or I'm too stupid. :icon_razz: But thanks anyway!

-Athleone

Ah sorry about that. There is nothing wrong with using XP. It's not a sin or anything. Even though Microsoft is 'satan' here at the CoG. Anyway as long as you're not using Internet Exploder (IE) you should be good! :D

Edit:OOPS! Accidental multi-post. My first day here and I screw up something. Not a good omen.


Not a problem. I can merge them for you. :D

Athleone
September 2nd, 2008, 02:12 PM
Thank you for that enlightment. However, I have one more question that I have forgotten to ask... (Google I must be annoying)

If I use Yahoo's email capabilities instead of Gmail, am I sinning? Do I have to convert to Gmail? I'm sorry for not asking this earlier, it just slipped my mind.

rzm61
September 2nd, 2008, 02:28 PM
Ha ha, you're not annoying. These are pretty much common questions with newcomers.

Anyway you can use Yahoo e-mail if you wish. Totally up to you. Google isn't a jealous or mean deity. She will always be there for you.

Now if you wish to use a superior e-mail service, then of course Gmail is the way to go. However it's personal choice as to which service you want to use.

Athleone
September 2nd, 2008, 02:37 PM
Google isn't a jealous or mean deity.


Commandment 2: Thou shalt not build thy own commercial-free Search Engine, for I am a jealous Engine, bringing law suits and plagues against the fathers of the children unto the third and fourth generations.

:icon_razz:

rzm61
September 2nd, 2008, 02:49 PM
....well first remember this is a parody.

And second, that's on the grounds of building your own search engine. Doesn't say anything about using Yahoo for your e-mail. :D

sudikics
September 2nd, 2008, 03:10 PM
Welcome, Athleone! I see that rzm has already gotten himself into a conundrum, so allow me to explain further.
My name is Athleone, and I am an atheist. I have read many articles and papers about the existence of God, and I have found that there is nearly no evidence of God's existence.
Unless you believe that big old book with funny writing in it! :D
Even though I think that Google is NOT a deity, it is still the close, and therefore I have joined the Church of Google, partly because of the proof you have revealed to me, and partly for the lulz.
You have just described exactly what the philosophy of Googlism is. We do not believe Google to be an actual deity, but rather, the closest thing mankind know of to deity that can be scientifically verified to exist. Oh, and we're all partly here for the lulz. Some of us are just partly here. :D
I have so many questions for you guys, but I have chosen the two most important questions to me to ask:
If you'd like ask us a stream of questions, let me recommend making a new thread about them in the appropriate section of the forum and listing them, maybe by number.
Firstly, if I use Windows XP, have I greatly sinned? Do I have to change my OS or at least use another OS to go on my journey of Googlism?
The concept of sinning doesn't really exist in Googlism, although we occasionally joke about it. And no, you do not have to change your OS. That would be stupid. Although you are using an inferior OS. ;) If you change your OS, be sure that you're doing it for better reasons.
Secondly, I have seen the prayers section, but how do you pray these prayers?
When this church was first founded two years ago, the original members thought it would make the CoG seem more church-like if there were prayers, too. People wrote those prayers, and they were displayed on the main site.

There is no obligation to recite, know, or even read those prayers. They are there to humor us and piss off uptight fundies.
Oh wait, that's three questions. Never mind that. I would greatly appreciate it if you guys could answer my questions. And with that, happy searching!
Thank you. Enjoy your time here!

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 2nd, 2008, 04:29 PM
Welcome to COG ... You seem like an interesting chap.

Loki
September 2nd, 2008, 10:25 PM
Hey there Athleone and welcome to the CoG.

Just enjoy yourself and don't take everything at face value. Some posters here have been known to make things up for the grin :D

rmw
September 3rd, 2008, 02:09 AM
Some of us are just partly here. :D

Most of us are just partly here.

sudikics
September 3rd, 2008, 02:11 AM
Most of us are just par
Fixed. :D

rmw
September 3rd, 2008, 02:12 AM
Fixed. :D

See, I proved my point!

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 3rd, 2008, 02:13 AM
But I am a birdy!

rmw
September 3rd, 2008, 02:14 AM
But I am a birdy!

As long as you're not underpar. Or is it subpar? Sorry, golf has never been my thing.

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 3rd, 2008, 02:15 AM
YAY you got it +10!

rmw
September 3rd, 2008, 02:20 AM
YAY you got it +10!

I r smrt! ;)

BTW, Athleone, threads are easily derailed here, in case you haven't noticed.

Athleone
September 3rd, 2008, 02:35 AM
I r smrt! ;)

BTW, Athleone, threads are easily derailed here, in case you haven't noticed.

I have noticed, luckily I have a long attention spa... OOH SHINY RED BALL!

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 3rd, 2008, 02:41 AM
Is is sparkly shiny or bald head shiny?

rmw
September 4th, 2008, 01:20 AM
Is is sparkly shiny or bald head shiny?

Because that makes all the difference in the world! ;)

Sister Faith
September 4th, 2008, 01:40 AM
Because that makes all the difference in the world! ;)

Of course it does! The sparkly ones are more shiny, more brilliant, more eye catching, more intriguing, more...

*oh yeah* Welcome Athleone.:icon_cool:

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 4th, 2008, 02:03 AM
I perfer the Bald headed kind... shiny by nature and not by fake add-ons!

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 02:37 AM
Yeah, the sparkly type is just annoying - reminds me of glitter.

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 4th, 2008, 02:38 AM
It is how I like my women to by nature no add-ons!

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 03:21 AM
It is how I like my women to by nature no add-ons!

Your women are glittery?

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 4th, 2008, 03:31 AM
No, think of it this way the shiny ball without glitter is natually shiny... or a girl who is natually beautiful... The glitter ball adds glitter or make up to make up for what it lakes making it worse...

http://www.resimland.net/data/media/345/alexis_bledel_13.jpg vs http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:nU9JzyAUO27O-M:http://www.buzzpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/courtney-love-01.jpg

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 03:38 AM
First I was confused, but after looking at the images I was horrified.

Sister Faith
September 4th, 2008, 03:54 AM
The glitter ball adds glitter or make up to make up for what it lakes making it worse...

I agree. Sometimes glitter is not a good thing (http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Arts/Arts_/Pictures/2007/02/06/cartland460.jpg).:icon_eek:

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 03:56 AM
Is it a new trend to post horrifying pictures or something? Oh yeah, it's not new.

rzm61
September 4th, 2008, 03:57 AM
Welcome to the Internetz!

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 04:04 AM
Welcome to the Internetz!

It's dangerous to go alone. Take this (http://strangemaps.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/online_communities1.png).

rzm61
September 4th, 2008, 04:26 AM
But there is one thing that's not on that map.

Watch out for this! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65I0HNvTDH4)

Athleone
September 4th, 2008, 04:28 AM
But there is one thing that's not on that map.

Watch out for this! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65I0HNvTDH4)

Wow, that's awesome. Fav'd.

Dr Goofy Mofo
September 4th, 2008, 02:26 PM
Women should not where make up!

Sister Faith
September 6th, 2008, 05:29 AM
Women should not where make up!

Neither should men (http://img443.imageshack.us/img443/7299/crossdresserfo8.jpg). :icon_lol:

rzm61
September 6th, 2008, 08:37 AM
Oh jesus.

You saw that too?
Listen. Tell the 'gals I'm sorry.


What a crazy night. In hindsight.