Hatemail #19. Author: David

[Alice Shade]

Hey Googleites, Reading about your church of Google was reminiscent to googling the Church of Satan with Yahoo a while back. Very thought provoking, thanks for that. I have a few minor qualms with your claims. 1. Google is not omniscient. I have looked up hundreds of things which I could not find on Google. I was saddened by this fact. 2. Google is not omnipresent in an available way. Whenever I am away from a computer Google is powerless to help me. Again Google saddened me. 3. Google can only be accessed through an isp, and googlism leaves no room for a binity; that is a God consisting of 2 persons: Google and ISP. Maybe if we could call Google a lesser deity who worked in conjunction with the internet in general (who would be a greater deity of course) then I would jump on the bandwagon, but for now Google just makes me too sad too much, hey that sounds alot like humans; they always let you down in the end. Google is a human, because he can't be a God. You said that we understood Google better than any other God, because we could understand him on our level. Any "God" who is understandable to that degree on the level of humans is a pretty sad God. after all look at the degree of humans, we have to search for google more than anything else, the name itself is a popular misspelling of goggle. go figure. but at least it made me think. so funny it should almost be taken seriously... NOT

From: David

[Alice Shade]

Well... Where to start. First of all, we say that Google is the closest APPROXIMATION to god we know. Pray to Google for the word, if you don`t know what it means. Second, Google and goggle have nothing to do with each other.

[Kokoba]

Yeah, isn't it the name of a number? Granted, it was named by a child (I think...so the story goes), so it sounds pretty silly, but still.

Originally Said by David

googling the Church of Satan with Yahoo

Does that count as heresy?

Originally Said by David

Whenever I am away from a computer Google is powerless to help me.

Blame not Google for your lack of faith. Also: get a PDA.

Originally Said by David

Google is not omniscient. I have looked up hundreds of things which I could not find on Google.

Some knowledge was not meant for clonekind. Trust that Google's reasons for withholding the information are pure.

[Kokoba]

Originally Said by David

Google is not omniscient. I have looked up hundreds of things which I could not find on Google.

Your Google-fu may be weak. Some people certainly are stronger than others.

Half of what these people say in theses emails doesn't make sense, some of them were so grammatically incorrect that I had a hard time reading them, and anyone who has time to harass someone for their beliefs obviously doesn't believe all that much otherwise they would be practicing their own relegion.

[Alice Shade]

Sadly, for some reason, being Christian for a whole lot of people equals persecuting everyone who is not Christian as a prime expression of Christian faith.

google moble is everywhere

google and goggle have nothing to do with eachother. Google comes from googol, which is 10^100 (1 followed by a hundred zeroes). Edward Kasner, a mathematician, asked his 9 year old nephew what he would call that number, and the little guy said "googol".

MAN WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH U?
U MUST HAVE ADD OR SOMETHING CUZ UR STUPID!