Google Prayers

Our Google

Our Google, who art in cyberspace,
Hallowed be thy domain.
Thy search to come,
Thy results be done,
On 127.0.0.1 as it is in the Googleplex.
Give us this day our daily searches,
And forgive us our spam,
As we forgive those who spam against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from Microsoft.
For thine is the search engine,
And the power,
And the glory,
Forever and ever.
Amen.

~ By Matt Bowen ~

This prayer is in binary.

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~ By Jonathan Hill ~

Hail Google

Hail Google, full of hits.
Our searches are with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst search engines,
and blessed is the fruit of thy servers.

Holy Google, Mother of Searches.
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our disk crash.
Amen.

~ By Larry Gagnon ~

The Google is my Engine; I shall not want.
She maketh me to improve myself:
She leadeth me to troves of knowledge.
She cacheth my lost pages:
She leadeth me in the paths of pagerank for her name’ sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of ignorance,
I will fear no linkfarms: For thou art with me;
Thy rank and thy mail, they comfort me.
Thou preparest tables before me with the presence of mine results;
Thou annointest my search with value; My content runneth over.

Surely pagerank and content shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell at the site of Google forever.

~ By Gavin McDonald ~

Our Google, who art in GooglePlex,
Hallowed be thy search,
Thy GoogleBots come,
The search will be done,
At school*, as it is at home.
Give us this day our daily search,
and forgive us our plaguirism,
as we forgive those who plaguirise against us.
And lead us not into Yahoo,
But deliver us from Microsoft.
For thine is the web**, the mail***, and the desktop****, forever and ever. Amen

* replace with work where appropriate
** through google websearch
*** through gmail
**** through google desktop

~ By Julian Farmer ~

Proverbs 3, 5-6. Sort of.

Trust in the GOOGLE with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge Her,
and She will direct your paths.

~ By Susan Harrison ~

Glory be to Google,
As it was in 1998,
Is now,
And ever shall be,
Searching without end,
Amen.

~ By Todd Berry ~

Google is my search engine; I shall not want another.
She maketh me to lay down searches in white pastures.
She leadeth me by the free results.
She restoreth my soul.

She leadeth me in the paths of revealing the unknown
For Her name sake.
Yea, though I walk through the silicon valley
of the shadow of other search engines,
I will fear no evil.

For thou art with me.
Thy PageRank and thy cache they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table of similar pages before me
In the presence of regular search results.

Thou anointest my head with algorithms;
My cup runneth over with your search tips.
Surely Googles index shall follow me,
All the search requests of my life.

And I will dwell in the homepage
Of Google forever.

~ By Niel Jenks ~

 

 

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